Friday, July 29, 2016

Youtube channel and Patreon Updates

Hello All !

I have decided to dedicate myself to my youtube channel and work on it a lot more starting in september.That means getting to 6 videos a month - i wanted to do this before but i just had too much to do already. To be able to do this, i have to cut down on some parts and simplify others.
I have a patreon page right here : Patreon
This platform is like a little hub for people who want to support my art and just give a few dollars as a thank you for the 6 videos i'll put up on my channel Sakuems .To be able to do this, i also had to simply rewards that patrons will get for their support. Before telling you what you get now, i would like to explain my new upcoming youtube schedule.

For now at least, i'm sitting out of the youtube artist collective. it adds too much pressure to be "forced" to put up content for a certain date. Even i can work ahead. I did it 4 times and it was stressing me out every time. I want to be a bit more "free" if that makes sense.

I'll be gone in august for 2 weeks so my schedule will be different but starting in September, and or every month i'll have 4 formats and 2 uploads per week.


• Art Works
This is my "big" piece of the month. It will be divided in 3 videos.
1/ Concept art and sketching 5 mins - the project genesis with voiceover
2/ Paint along video 30 mins - the project evolution in real time, voiceover with Q&A
3/ Full time lapse process 5 mins  - the project summary with music

• Art Talk
Every month, i'll sit down and talk to you about any artsy stuff i know or wonder about. It will be about art and what's around it, business wise, youtube wise, money, style, techniques, little color theory classes etc.

• Art Experiments
Every month, i'll make a video when i just experiment with things, draw everything i usually don't draw or paint weird stuff ...this type of artwork don't have a required outcome or anything. won't probably be used in a print etc. it's just practice and fun and challenging myself. Like if i practice flowers, landscapes, shapes or anatomy etc. i won't necessary make a print of this. I might sell originals of those if i like them. I don't have to think about the meaning of those pieces.

• Art Studies
Every month, i'll just record myself doing a speed paint of some sort. Any random idea i have, like an apple, a tree, work on texture, paint a portrait, paint hair, or still life etc.. compared to experiments, an art study will have a finished result, it's not just practicing, it's from start to finish to have an outcome and some meaning so it's more than an experiment but not a full art work.

Basically, my art experiments lead to studies who can lead to art works :)
Hopefully art works will lead to master pieces (we can hope lol)
Based on this schedule, i'll have 6 videos each month. No particular order. And format can evolve or change, some month i might have 2 studies and no art work project. Some months i'll have an art haul and no art vlog etc. Every hour of work i used to put on patrons exclusive rewards will be used to create more content for youtube.

For patreon, here are the rewards you'll get

Pledge 1$
• Channel Support in exchange of the 6 videos i put up on my channel ! thank you :)
• MD scan of the month (1200 px height)

Pledge $5
• Channel Support In exchange of the 6 videos i put up on my channel ! thank you :)
• 1 HDscan of the month (3000 px height)
• 1 HD sketch of the month (3000 px height)
• Upcoming Art exclusive info from time to time, i will share exclusive content here before anywhere else !

Pledge $10
• All 5$ rewards +
• All HD scans of the artworks i do each month (2+)
• All HD scans of the Sketches i do each month (2+)

Pledge $17

• All 10$ rewards +
• A6 (4x6") Art Print of the month sent to you

Pledge $35
• All 10$ rewards +
• A5 (6x8") Exclusive ORIGINAL colored sketch sent to you every month.

I hope this is clear and easy to understand :)
thanks you for reading all this and for your support !

i'll see you soon !

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Second Oil painting ever !

Hello :)

So today i faced my fear of oil paints ! i only did one painting with oils, years ago and i just thought it was too hard, too messy, too long etc.. so i never touched them again in like nearly 10 years, until today !
I watched a bunch of tutorials (specially lachri fine art on youtube) for weeks and weeks and i really wanted to try oils again but i just didn't know how to do it, where to start and how to make it look like i want it to look like.
It's really hard when you're used to getting a certain result with the tools you know, to not be able to get that result with the tools you don't know.
it's like i know how to shade, color, bring to life something with my copic markers, or watercolors or colored pencils but with paints i'm clueless. I know the process, i know in theory how i should build the piece and the shading but on the canvas itself, i'm stop lost, because the things i'm used to do can't be applied to oils.

It's definitely a learning process and i used to be very bad at any tool until i got better so i can only practice and experiment a bit more. I did acrylic paintings before but not much, i was never a huge fan of paint, i love the medium and how it looks but i'm not patient enough for the process and the mess it is (spent 30 mins cleaning my workspace and brushes)

I worked on an 8"8" canvas board ! too small for me, but i didn't want to waste the paint on a large canvas so that's why i picked this one. I definitely want to make bigger paintings to get more comfort in like my brushes strokes and stuff. I don't have brushes to do the details and i don't want to get into tiny things and struggle to get it done. I think it's possible but it's not really what i want.
I don't need to do big paintings but something like twice the size i used would be good.

Anyway, that's the first session for this painting/study. Nothing fancy, a portrait with flowers.
I used fine quality oils and liquin medium + white spirit as paint thinner ( i need to get an odorless one soon). It's not dry yet, i think it should be ok within a couple days (liquin acts as a speed dryer process). I don't plan on working on this again until next week anyway since i need to tackle my big Copic Artwork for saturday's youtube video.

It was a lot of fun definitely, for once, i actually enjoy the process because i was discovering things and trying different methods. I can't wait to work on a bigger scale :)


Sunday, February 7, 2016

The price i pay - Artist evolution

Whenever people ask me where i learn how to draw and that i said "i've been to Art School" they always have that same look. The look that says "oh makes sense, u learned everything there" and then when i say to them "i didn't learn to draw in art school" they always ask the same question : What did you learn in art school then ?
I stayed 3 years. From 2007 to 2010. Only now i realized what i really learned during those 3 years.
And i also wonder if it was probably the best experience of my life or the worse. I know it was probably the one that made me grow the most.

I also think it's the one experience that made me afraid of art. 
Yes, Afraid.

I'm going to talk about something i wanted to talk for a long time. I realized that there's no way for me to really make a video about it - Althought i might tackle this one day - so i figured it would be an interesting topic to approach here.
I want to tell you more about the price i pay and what art school has done to me.
As i said, i didn't learn to draw. or color. or paint. or anything technical for that matter, althought i had a few color theory approaches and some basic practice, the teachers weren't necessary trying to make us become "good" artists or "good" painters or anything like that.
The main approach during those 3 years was the absract concept of "developping your art"
Developping is a large concept, it can be about the themes your want to approach, the tools you're going to use, the meaning behind what you'll produce.
That's something i never asked myself before going to art school. That's something i never thought i'll have to ask myself. That's something i'm able to put in words now but wasn't able to when i was in art school at all.
I was just drawing. I didn't have intentions, i didn't have a motive, i didn't have anything to say. I didn't want people to feel something when they see my work.
I was just drawing. Just, drawing.
And i was enjoying it for the whole purpose of drawing, as an escape, as a pleasure, as this little extension of my imagination. Because the creative process made me simply happy. Not the outcome, not the idea, not the message. Just the art as a all.

It all changed with art school. It also changed within time, of course. Every artist's art is growing as the artist grow. My art is within me, if i change, if i evolve, my art HAS to evolve. If i'm not connected to my work, that means something's off, something's wrong, something's missing.
You see my problem here ? Every single time i'm beginning my creative process, i ALWAYS have to ask myself "why"
Before art school, before people made me ask questions about my work, i never never asked "why" i was drawing or painting. I was just doing it. Now, every piece i produce, every bits of myself that i pour into my work as to resonate within me, has to mean something, needs a message, a motive, a reason.
I want to transcend my work, make it matter, make it special, unique, grandiose, memorable.
I didn't want that before, i never even wondered about such things. Many artists are simply making art just to make art, they don't ask themselves why all the time right ?
I can't do free art anymore. I'm scared of everything i'm going to draw or paint because i'm scared it will be useless, boring, irrelevant and a simili of the art i really want to make.
I'm scared of it because i see works of art, wonderful works of art, everywhere around me, whenever i see the work of another artist, i always ask the same question i'm asking myself "WHY"
Why did they do it ? because if i know why, i'm sure i'll figure it out myself for my own work. Then most of the time, there's no reasons, it's just there, it just happened. They didn't ask themselve before doing it, they just did.
Then i ask myself "HOW" ? how did they do it without even thinking about the reasons? How to thrive as an artist whitout being constantly harrassed by thoughts about the process, the means, the skills, the fear of being plain and make art that doesn't matter or will never matter because everyone else either did it before you or are doing it already ?
What makes us different ? why is there so many artists ? why some can't make it, some can ? who decide who matters and who don't ?
Why is this so important to me ?? why can't i enjoy the simple process and the journey instead on focusing on the outcome ? WHy am i always dreaming about the kind of art i want to do but i can't never capture it fully ?

Art school destroyed my art freedom. They made me question every single thing and never told me to enjoy the process of be happy about my work and just go with the flow. Because of that, i can't produce anything without having a reason for it. I always find a reason. It's for Youtube, it's a commission, it's for my artbook, it's for this or for that. I might sell it. This is simply "for my job"
This is for "something" but never just for the Art itself.

Art School made me realize how art was important to me. how it was the only thing i could be proud off one day. How important and amazing it would made me feel if i found a way to make it matter and if i found my inner peace through it. I only realize that now.

I went through phases, i think every artist is going through this. I'm not alone, i know plenty of us think all this and we are constantly struggling to channel our thoughts, imagination with tangible content that will made us proud and happy. I tried things before, i'm not saying that i'm not evolving as a person and by extension as an artist. I do. I have changed over the past 5 years. I think my Art made me grow and that i made my Art grow too.
But not enough. not as much as i want. not as much as i hoped.
I'm not where i want to be. I'm not happy. I'm not proud.
I believe there's a reason why i'm an Artist, i do have something in me that needs time to grow and change to be out there. A part of my true creative self that's been changed and modified when i was still a teenager, that part, that emotion, that sparkle i had before Art School that made me want to eat the world with my works. Art school made me grow but also made it harder for me to keep evolving.
I want to find a way to finally access those thoughts, those ideas, i can't pin point exactly what, i don't think it's essential to even gave a term for it but something's inside, somethin's blocked.
Whenever i see the work of an artist that i love and i feel connected to it and i'm like "i wish it was done by my hands, i should have done this, this represents me and how i feel" i'm also dying inside.
I'm dying because i didn't do that artwork and i'm dying because it has been done already and i think there's no point trying to do it now since others already filled that gap/that path.

I don't matter.
And i fuckin hate the fact that i feel the need to matter.
But it's more than this. It's not a vanity issue, I don't want to be famous.
I want people to feel inspired, truely, fully, entirely captivated about what i do.
I know some are feeling that way towards what i do right now and i appreciate it.
I also know a lot of my followers are enjoying my evolution and are accepting every twist of it.

Others can be a reason to make art.
I'm not making it for myself only. I never actually wanted to put myself out there. I don't do self portraits, i don't have to look at me to thrive or evolve. I want my art to be directed at others, at their emotions, at Humans in general, but i'm a part of it, i'm like within the brush strokes, i'm in the lines, i'm in the colors. I'm the creator. But what i want is to see myself in the Artwork without seeing myself at all.

I want to look at something i did and be unable to look away when it's done.
I want to have shivers when i see something i did.
I want to touch people.

And i don't know how
And i don't know why

I've been feeling like that for months. I'm trying so so hard to push myself but i'm torn between what i want to do, what i wish i was doing, what i have to do and that constant battle within me about the pure enjoyment of art without questionning it, simply making what my habit makes me do and this loud voice in my head saying to myself "you're doing another pretty girl portrait with flowers, you did that hundreds of time, stop it, it's useless, boring and it won't make you evolve"

I feel good and bad
I feel stuck instead of feeling free
I should be happy for what i have already but i can't content myself because i feel i deserve more
I know i have something to show, something deeper, but i can't never put myself into a position where i'm going to really tackle those urges because of stupid reasons such as "i don't have the time for it" or "it's too hard" or "i can't make it" or "i have to do this first, and this, and this"
It's true, i don't really have the time or the luxury to stop everything i'm doing (Youtube, commissions and online shop) to just experiment or go in an Art Retrait or something like that.

But even if i was going, same questions over and over again.
Why would i even care about finding my true artist self if everything that comes to my mind has already been done by others ? why can't i find this little thing that will made me different ? and why do i even care about being different anyway ?!
I don't know
Does this make me cocky ? does this makes me arrogant ? to just want to be remembered ?

Will i ever get the courage to just break free from all this ?
How can i evolve and still enjoy the process ?
How to find the balance between what you have to do, what you want to do, what you can do and what you can't ?

Being an Artist is both a blessing and a curse.
I adore it, i hate it too. Sometimes i feel unique and special, something i feel like nothing.
I can spend hours thinking about art and still not produce anything i like.
I believe Artists have something non artists don't have.
What exactly ? i don't know
I just see things differently.
I just really really really want to find a way to be fully proud of what i'm doing but still find a way to feel ok when i'm not proud of it.

Am i getting there ?
Is the price i pay that constant fear of failure mixed with that constant feeling of pride ?
Are Artists destined to fight themselves for their entire life ?

I hope i'll find a way.
I definitely think putting it in words helps.
But in the end, i'm the only one who can make the choice.
I'm the only one who can decide if it worth the try or not.
I will never find my true self i don't even really search for it.
I can't never be the Artist i want to be if i don't really paint, draw and create, even the shittiest most conformist work of art you can do.

I can only try and hope it will work one day.
I can only try and hope to be proud one day


Product review !

Hello everyone :)

Here's a new video ! I've been contacted by Col Art UK who owns the brushmarker and promarkers acolohol based markers to make a review for them :)
They were really kind and gave me lots of markers + a marker pad to try out and then give away to one of my follower !
i'll definitely keep those in stock for a 50K subscribers give away ^^
I really enjoyed working with the markers but not so much for the paper. it's a bit too soft, fragile and hard to layer colors on it. But it does look nice in the end and very saturated. I also liked that unity/clean coloring that happened, it's like the colors were very smooth and spreaded evenly on the surface, which is something i don't have on my bristol paper or cardstock.
I think that's the good side of marker paper, i wish it was just a tiny bit thicker.

Anyway, i don't have much more to say, if you want to find out everything about my review and take a look at the artwork i did with those markers, it's right here : 

Saturday, February 6, 2016

The Seer

Hello guys !
I have decided i'm going to use this blog more often :)
 Here's a new artwork i'm working on ! it's going to be 30 x 40 cm (quite large !) and full Copic Markers + colored pencils for some parts

I'm going to record the coloring process of course ^^ I hope you'll like this new artwork !
I need to work more on this blog (specially the page layout)
If you want to see more of my next artworks, work in progress and overall bits and stuff about my art life, feel free to follow me here so you get notified everytime i make a new post ^^

 I'll talk to you soon !

Monday, November 16, 2015

Artbook Crowdfunding campaign !

Here it is !! more than 60 artworks in a new book ! 90+ pages, full color with fantasy and moder art + step by steps + sketches collection and even art commentary :) I hope you'll like this project and support me ! thanks :D

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

#howdoyoucopic contest !

Je suis dans les finalistes du concours !

Si vous voulez m'aider à gagner, cliquer sur ce lien pour regarder ma vidéo !! un max de vue = un max de chances de gagner :D

merci !!

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Mini Art and Stickers

Coucou :p

à fond dans les nouveaux projets !
je bosse sur une série de "mini dessins" pour ma page patreon, j'ai aussi lancé des stickers !
en plus de ça, je projette de faire un nouvel artbook dans les mois qui viennent et bien sur, toujours 4 vidéos par moi sur youtube ! ^^
ce mois-ci il y aura même un bonus avec 2 vidéos français ! woo hoo !
quoi d'autre ... ah ben oui, j'ai aussi des commandes directes et je tente ma chance dans un concours de dessin avec un premier prix énorme (même si je doute avoir le premier prix) !
En bref, plein de projets existants et qui me prennent du temps !
vivement les vacances d'été lol
il faudrait que j'arrête de tout faire en même temps ahahah XD

Enfin bref, pour ceux qui me lisent, voilà un petit preview des mini art et des stickers
et si ça vous dit de les avoir, c'est par là que ça se passe